Two-Thirds Gone

Eph 5:15-17

15  Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16  making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 

ESV

We are in Pittsburgh for the Thanksgiving holiday and we are staying at my mother-in-law's house. It is a smaller house so my 3 girls are sharing a bedroom. It's a little tight so the first night it didn't take them long to get irritated with each other. I used it as a chance to remind them that in 6 short years the oldest of the 3 could be on her way to college and they wouldn't always have the chance to do fun things like this because she might not be living with us anymore.. Well that made one of my girls cry. (I have to admit it was nice to see) Then it hit me. That applies to me as well. She will be 12 soon which means she is two-thirds gone if she goes to college at 18. Talk about a sobering moment.

So, when our kids say, "Daddy, come play with me." or "Daddy, will you read to me?" ask yourself if what you are doing is really that important. When they want to talk but you just want them to go to bed, be thankful that they still want to talk. If they aren't getting attention from you, know that they WILL eventually find it elsewhere.

So, have you been telling yourself that you were going to make a better effort at reading the bible to your children or doing family devotions or praying together with your wife but the days, weeks and months go by and nothing changes? What is getting in the way? Ask yourself this question.

This time next year, what would you like your child to be?
a) a better athlete
b) a better student
c) closer to God and love Him more.

If you had to chose one and ONLY one which would it be?

Did you choose?

Most likely it was 'c'. Be closer to God and love Him more.

Now ask yourself, did the way you spent your time in 2009 move your child towards that goal? If not what can you change?

Ask God to show you the things in your life that are getting in the way of what is important then ask Him to help you remove those things from your life.  Then ask Him to give you the power and the desire to do the things that will make an ETERNAL difference in the life of your family. 

I personally can do a lot better. We pray a lot as a family and I am happy about that but  I've made a commitment  to do a better job of teaching my girls what we believe and why we believe it. This is no New Years Resolution. By God's GRACE It's a LIFE Resolution. It starts now. Who's with me? 

Let's hold each other accountable. 

"Our Duty in Serving Christ Lies Always Near to Our Hand."

I have had many conversations recently with other well meaning Christians about never forgetting the PRIMARY ministry that God has called us to. I was blessed and convicted by this Grace Gem. I hope you are as well.

Stay away from the church service! 

(J. R. Miller, "Serving and Following Christ" 1903)

Serving Christ is something very practical. Some people seem to think it is something aside from their common life, something that belongs only to Sundays, something that can be done only in certain holy moments. But serving Christ is really one's very life--or it is nothing. It does not consist merely in acts of worship. There are times when one's first and most sacred duty--is to stay away from the church service! 

A young mother was regretting that she had been able to attend church so rarely during the six months since her baby came. But if the baby really needed a mother's care all those months, she would have been unfaithful to her Master--if she had neglected it even to attend church services.

A pleasant story tells of a dying mother, who left her young daughter in charge of her little sick sister. All her days and nights were filled with this care of love. She could not attend church services nor take any part in Christ's work outside of her little home. It grieved her, for she loved Christ and longed to be of use in His service.

One night she dreamed that the Master had come, and she stood before Him, painfully explaining why she had not been able to do any work for Him, because all her time and strength were required in caring for her suffering sister. "That child is Mine!" said the Master. She could not have served Him better--than in tending this little one of His that needed her care and was her special charge. If she had failed in this duty, even in order to attend church services, if she had neglected this sick child in order to help others outside her home--the Master would have been grieved!

Our duty in serving Christ lies always near to our hand. It is never someimpossible thing that He wants us to do.

There was an artist who wished to leave behind him some noble work that would live through all time. He sought for material fine enough for his dream. He traveled to distant lands and journeyed far and near in vain quest for what he sought. He came home an aged man, weary and disappointed, and found that from the common clay beside his own door--his old apprentice had made marvels of loveliness which were praised by all who saw them, and had won him fame.

Just so, many people longing to do noble things for Christ, look far offfor the opportunities, missing meanwhile services which wait for them close by their doors. Nothing is grander for us any day, than . . .
  the quiet doing of God's will,
  simple faithfulness in common duty,
  making the best of what lies close to our hand!

Consider the Fruit Fly

"Daddy how does God see and hear everything at the same time? How do I know He hears me?" 

That is a question I got from one of my girls just yesterday. It's a tough one to answer in their language. Of course I went into God's sovereignty and that He is omnipresent which for the most part can be understood by an 11 year old. Then today, once again, God gave me a little gift via satellite radio. He has been doing this to me a lot lately and I am grateful.

I caught the end of a Christian call-in show where a caller was posing a similar question along the lines of, "How can God love everybody?" I will try to summarize what the host said.

Humans have two eyes which we can see straight ahead as well as with limited peripheral vision. The fruit fly however, has many, many eyes and they see so much more! While you and I have 2 eyeballs and can only see limited things the fruit fly has many eyeballs and they see so much more! Now imagine God who is big enough to have 3 trillion eyeballs which see 3 trillion things at a time and actually care! You are one of those people that one of those eyeballs is focused on right now and He in His infinite expanse of being, sees you, cares about what He sees and He loves you.

Not to compare God to a fruit fly but what a great example of how we let our own experiences limit our understanding of God. Just look around at His creation and see the many examples of how wonderful and amazing our Creator is! Sometimes the things that we don't understand about God, while always explained in His Word, can also be found in the things that he created....maybe even flying around in your kitchen!

Rom 1:20

20 For ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky. Through everything God made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse for not knowing God.

NLT

Life is a School...Don't Let the Lessons Go To Waste!

To many people--life is very hard

(J. R. Miller, "Life's Byways and Waysides")

For the Christian, all of life's conditions and circumstances are transformed.

Take the matter of CARE. Every life has 'cares'. There are cares in business. There are cares in home-life. There are cares of poverty--but no less has the rich man his cares. Childhood has its anxieties; young faces sometimes appear careworn. No one can escape care!

To many people--life is very hard. But Christian faith transfigures care, for those who are Christ's and have learned how to live as He teaches us to live. He tells us not to worry about anything, because our Father is caring for us. He tells us thatlife is a school, and that all our cares are parts of lessons which He has set for us. That means that every care has hidden in it--a secret of blessing--a gift of lovewhich our Father has sent to us. Every time you come to a hard point in your life--an obstacle, a difficulty, a perplexity--God is giving you a new opportunity to grow stronger, wiser, or richer-hearted. 

We try to make life easy for our children--but God is wiser than we are. He wantsHis children to have struggles--that they may grow strong, holy and noble!

Thus it is that common care is transfigured by the grace of Christ! It enfolds blessings for us. It carries in its 'dreary form' secrets of blessing for us. Even our 'drudgeries' have blessings in their wearisome routine; we get many of our best lessons out of them.

All we need to learn is how to meet our worries, and they are transfigured for us! Paul tells us in a wonderful passage how to get this transformation of care: "Do not worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7. God's peace will then shine through all life's frets. Thus care is transfigured, by the love of Christ in the heart.

A Believers Life-Mission!

I just received this tonight from www.gracegems.org. I love God's timing!


It makes me think of how we mentioned in parenting class tonight that giving our children the moral reason why is not a "one and done" event. It is a process that requires consistency and one that goes on until our children become young adults. I talked about how sometimes I expect my children to show self-control in areas that I am still struggling with as an adult. If I have not learned some of these life lessons at 40 years old why do I expect my 11 year old to have mastered it by now? Pretty crazy when you think about it!


We are all being transformed daily in our Christian walk and it is a life long process. As the Grace Gem below says, it's our "Life-Mission!" Enjoy! I hope you are blessed!


A believer's life-mission

(J. R. Miller, "Life's Byways and Waysides")

"If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" 2 Corinthians 5:17

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind!" Romans 12:2

"And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into His likeness." 2 Corinthians 3:18

The character of every true believer is being transformed. If Christ dwells in you, He will produce in you the same kind of life which He himself lived when He was on the earth. This change does not come in its completeness, or instantaneously the moment one believes in Christ. But it does begin then.

Life is large. Life's lessons are many and hard to learn! Paul was an old man when he said, "I have learned, in whatever state I am, therein to be content." It had taken him many years to learn this lesson of contentment.

Likewise, it takes us years to get life's lessons learned. But nothing is clearer, than that a believer's life-mission --is to be transformed into the likeness of Christ. There is to be a transformation of character. Holiness must become the every-day dress of the Christian. We are called to be saints, even in this sinful world.

"So that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe!" Philippians 2:15

Are You Speaking Their Language?

Tonight Sherry and I did our homework for this weeks Vertical Parenting Class. It involved individually asking each of our girls a series of 20 questions to determine what their Touch Point of Love is. The five touch points are as follows:

1. Encouraging Words

2. Acts of Service

3. Gift-Giving

4. Quality Time

5. Touch

I have to say that I am not surprised by what we found out. Without getting in to all of the details for each of our girls I will say that quality time with Mom and Dad stood out for all three girls. Today's families have many demands and responsibilities from work, school and home not to mention the potential to be overwhelmed with extra-curricular activities. Unfortunately, this means quality time can be the first Touchpoint to be crowded out. Things like eating dinner together and family devotions become rarity rather than the norm.

It is relatively easy to buy something special for my girls or even to say or do something nice but to carve out uninterrupted time just to be with them can be easily overlooked. I schedule appointments for work, ministry, sports and personal events but if I am not deliberate about scheduling uninterrupted time with my girls then days and weeks can go by without it happening. This means learning to say "no" to things that may seem urgent but really are not that important. I have learned that every time I say "yes" to someone else it usually means I have to say "no" to my wife or children.

Sherry and I both have been making an extra effort to spend one-on-one time with each of our girls. Sometimes we go out for a hot chocolate or to that casino for kids a.k.a. Chuck E Cheeze just to play a few games of skee-ball. or even just taking one of the girls to run a few errands can mean a lot to a child. It's amazing how much conversation you can have with a 9 year old while you are driving if you actually turn the radio OFF! 

For me, I have started celebrating their birthday every month by taking them out for a few hours on their monthly birth "day." While it doesn't always work out as planned it does keep me on track and causes me to "pencil them in" as one of my most important priorities. It definitely has given them and me something to look forward to every month.

I am a firm believer that you cannot have quality time without quantity time. The more quantity time you spend with your children the greater chance you have of being there for those quality moments. Once again, I believe that time should be uninterrupted. By this I mean no television, no cell phone calls, no blackberry emails or anything else that would compete with your child for your time and attention. It took me a while but I realized that if I didn't answer that call or that email immediately it wouldn't be the end of the world!

I encourage anyone with children to take the test with them. You may or may not be surprised by what you find but one thing is for sure, you will know how to speak their language when you are done! You can download the Touchpoints of Love for Your Children here and print it out. There is also a Love Language Evaluation for husbands and wives that you can download here.

Heaven Is The Face

As some of you may know, Contemporary Christian recording artist Steven Curtis Chapman lost his 5 year old daughter Maria in a tragic accident last year when she was struck by a vehicle in the driveway of his home. When Steven wrote the song Cinderella it was about making the most of every moment as his daughter was growing up because one day she would be grown and gone. This tragic event gave a whole new meaning to that song. The recorded version of the song ends with the following lyrics.

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight

And she'll be gone

We have recently seen Steven in concert in early 2009, almost 1 year after the death of his daughter. He spoke of the nearly unbearable pain that he and his family experienced and continue to live with everyday. Through the pain of losing his daughter he has been able to rest in the hope and the REALITY that he will one day see Maria again. One of the most moving moments of the concert was when he performed the song Cinderella but changed the last part of the song to reflect what he believes will happen one day.

Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight

but I know, the TRUTH is, the dance will go on.

Steven Curtis Chapman has released a new song called Heaven is the Face. It is an amazing testimony of the hope that we have when we put our full faith and trust in Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of our sins. (1 Peter 1:3-6) and that we can trust Him even through our darkest valleys. It also is one more reminder that our time here on this earth is short compared to the eternity we will spend in heaven. It makes me ask myself, how am I spending my time? Am I spending it wisely? Is what I am doing making an eternal difference with my children? I hope both songs bless you as much as they have me.

Spankings Dont Save Children...The Gospel Saves Children (Parenting Within the Framework of the Gospel)

As John Piper says in the first video, "The grace of God in the Gospel becomes the rule and the power by which our children live."

What does it mean to live by the POWER of the Gospel? What does "Grace Living" mean? If I could sum it up in my limited understanding it would be seeking and depending on the Holy Spirit of God in every area of life. To lead us, guide us, correct us, help us, strengthen us and empower us. God's grace does not ONLY mean forgiveness but in His grace there is POWER to overcome sin! (Philippians 4:13.) We can't do it on our own. As regenerated believers we do not have to live or parent under our own strength. It is Christ who lives through us in all areas of our lives. (Galatians 2:20.) We are new creatures! (2 Corinthians 5:17.) Grace gives you the desire and the power to do right.

We must teach our children this early and often. Not only by teaching them the scriptures but also, and perhaps just as importantly modeling it in our every day lives. It is only by God's grace that we can do this.

When Ball Becomes Baal

When Ball Becomes Baal

By Jim Elliff
It's rare to see kids playing sports in the neighborhood anymore. We're now organized and "professionalized"—including uniforms, state-of-the-art facilities, endless trips to the field, competitive coaches, equally competitive parents, and the after-season tournaments designed to give parents "bleacher bottom." In addition, you've got to pay to play—and when you've paid that much, you'll be sure to play.

It is also fun, and it can be instructive. I love to watch my kids play sports. In fact, they need to play—some. But, it's not so easy as handing over seventy bucks and saying, "Sign up Johnny and Susie this year." Making that decision means that you may be out four to five times each week during the season. Soon sports becomes all about calendarization and control of your life—especially if you have more than one kid. Perhaps nothing outside of a change in your job has so much potential to turn the family schedule upside down.


"This man understands," you say.

Now comes the part you won't like: "Behold, I say unto you, you have made sports the household god." Too strong? OK, not all of you. But the deification of sports is happening to many.

How does ball become Baal? Answer: When it controls you, and you give it devoted worship. It is around your god that you order your life—and you can almost never say "no" to it.

Like "athlete's foot" on the hygienically-challenged teenager, sports has taken over more and more of the life of believers. Almost overnight we have awakened to the sad fact that, in many communities, sports has even usurped the hours believers meet on the Lord's Day. All too often members are saying to church leaders, "We'll be gone next Sunday because of the soccer tournament." In turn, leaders are supposed to acquiesce humbly. After all, we can't afford to appear "legalistic;" everyone knows that the greatest crime a church can commit is to demand something of someone.

You'll hear, "But the team needs all the players. We can't let the team down." It never occurs to them that the church Body is being deprived of a necessary body part, or that God is marginalized and disobeyed. We are not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together, states God in Hebrews 10:25.

Devotion is the operative word. When the team says, "We need you," we sacrifice to do it. But when it crosses the time allotted to spiritual edification and worship, the Ruler of the universe is often sent to the bench. In the process, we teach our children that devotion to sports is more important than both devotion to God and loyalty to our spiritual family. Have you considered that you may be teaching your kids to worship sports?

Here are some ways to put sports in the proper place:

First, decide beforehand that there will be no contest between the church's essential activities designed for your family's spiritual growth and what the team plans for your lives. If you will talk this over ahead of time with your child and then the coach, there will be no confusion. Through the years I've found that many coaches respect that decision. But, it must be a prior decision, not one made on a case by case basis. When sports conflicts with Sunday worship or youth camp or a special spiritual activity, the decision has already been made.

Secondly, determine that your children cannot play every sport. There is a sanctity to the home life that must be protected. You need quiet evenings at home. You need meals together. Just let your children know that you are excited about sports, but there are limits. You then determine what those limits are. For us, we attempt to have only one sport per year for each child.

Finally, think about some creative choices. One of my sons played basketball, but the season was interminably long. I was also traveling. So, I would be gone speaking over the weekend, then, when I was home, I was out two or more nights sitting on the sidelines watching my son practice. It was not really "time together." This wasn't going to work.

The solution came to me after prayer. I asked him if he would be willing to learn golf in the place of basketball. We could play together, along with his brother, and we could do it whenever we wanted. We could enjoy this for the rest of our lives. I've paid some extra money, but I've bought back some time with my sons and some good exercise for me also. It's a bargain.

God Himself uses sports language in the New Testament. He's not against it, unless it steals the devotion belonging to Him. All other gods have to go!

Copyright © 2004 Jim Elliff
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